Friday, July 06, 2007

Release the Sound!

...so I ordered the new UNKLE album, "War Stories", as the super-dooper-Limited-Edition 2CD magic thing package, but got an e-mail today from Play saying they'd run out, or aliens had vomited on them or something. Bah. One quick trip into town later and ta-da!, one cleverly vacuum-packed well-posh-innit music bulk in my possession.

But getting hold of it was the easy part. Listening to it was the real challenge. Stupid.. hnnng... CDs won't ... arghle... come out of ... f'ing... case...

Note to fancy designers: If you're going to vacuum-seal your limited edition baby (not literal baby. I hope.), you can bank on increasing the value by making it only openable through precious-packaging-destroying maneuvres, or near as taodammit that the "war stories" of opening it make it go down in history. At least, I'm assuming by sucking all the air out of it, things get "tight" inside...

After 5 minutes of palm-slapping and vague physical sadism, I resorted to the Gordon Ramsay approach as recommended in the last link:


Unfortunately, the tiny-but-pointy brothers failed in their task. The wooden spat-u-twins in the background were similarly akin to pushing buttered pigs up trouser legs to get the ferret out. So the big boys came out:


Success! And extra magic bonus points for not slicing and dicing own wrists in process. If you're reading this after wondering what your "new" album (bought a month ago) sounds like, then I recommend using it as an excuse to go out and buy a pair of big FO shiny Knives. Japanese ones are "cool", apparently.

All in all, I quite enjoyed this challenge. It provided a welcome variation to the little milk cartonlets you get on planes to annoy the person behind you. I give it a 7.5 out of 10, although it'll be a while before I'm brave enough to put the CD away again. (Listening to it now, it sounds pretty good, which is also a handy win.)

p.s. am away for 2 weeks, so don't go eating my cheese. Help yourself to tea though.

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